The Thing's the Play
by Random Guise
Summary: Takes place before the movie "Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure". Once again Bill and Ted have to pass a class or Ted is going to military school and it puts them in the school production of Romeo and Juliet. Written on request of LiveFoREVer93 and I don't own these characters although I have seen a play written by Shakespeare. 4 chapters.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: A short that takes place the year before the movie "Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure" (1988).**

* * *

The Thing's the Play

"I know what you're thinking" Mrs. Harriet Yasmin told her Literature class. "Shakespeare lived a long time ago, back when everyone talked funny and wore weird clothes." Several in the class laughed.

"Yeah, why didn't they talk English?" Ted "Theodore" Logan asked earnestly.

"Was it some kind of code or something?" his friend, Bill S. Preston Esquire chimed in.

"Believe it or not, everyone talked like that back then" Harriet went on. If any of you have ever seen your parents' yearbook pictures, you probably saw that they dressed a lot differently and used some different words. Have you ever heard them use the word 'groovy'?" A girl raised her hand. "Do you know what it means, Steph?"

Stephanie Chase cleared her throat. "I think it means cool."

"That's right. And if any of you get married and have kids, they'll probably use words you've never heard of either. The more time goes by, the more language changes - and Shakespeare was a long time ago so lots of the words have changed. But we're going to take care of that for our big class production of Romeo and Juliet. Tomorrow we're going to go over the story and start planning our play." The ending bell rang. "See you tomorrow!" The students gathered their books and papers and headed out towards the next class.

"Ted? Bill?" Mrs. Yasmin called to the two friends. They peeled off from the exiting throng and walked back to the teacher's desk.

"Ma'am?" Ted asked.

"Guys, I know you're not the best students in school, but you're in danger of flunking this class. You're going to need to do really well at the end of the year to even pass."

"We shall endeavor to double our efforts" Bill announced proudly, leaning back and smiling.

"I doubt even that will be enough."

Bill frowned as he visibly slumped. "Bogus."

"But there is a way to do it. Neither of you is afraid to speak up in class; do you like to perform?"

"Do we!" Ted exclaimed. "Bill and I have a band!"

"Really? What's it called?" she asked.

"Uh...we haven't got a name yet" Ted admitted. "But it's gonna totally rock!"

"The band or the name?"

They looked at each other. "Both!" they screamed as they fingered an air guitar.

"Wonderful. This play isn't a musical though, but if you want to pass the class I think you'd better volunteer to act in it on Monday. I'll have a signup sheet and you can choose which roles you want to play. I warn you that you might have to compete against others for the good parts."

"We understand, Mrs. Yasmin" Ted offered seriously.

"Good. Then I'll see you both on Monday. Better hurry to your next class now!" she said as she waved them out of the room.

Later after school, out in the hall Bill asked "What do you think the 'good parts' she mentioned are, Ted?" as they hurried to their next class.

Ted thought for a moment before laughing and saying "The ones with the fewest lines, dude!"

...

At the start of the next week Bill and Ted stood outside of the classroom and read the notice posted on the door.

_STUDENTS_  
_Sign-ups for class play today_  
_Pick your favorite character  
Limited roles available  
Sign up for ONE only_

"Who's our favorite character?" Bill asked. "Did you look up the play?"

"No; after I went to the mall for this Van Halen T-shirt I totally forgot" Ted shrugged and shook his head, his straight black hair flopping about.

"That T-shirt is most triumphant and stylish."

"I know; I think I'll wear it the rest of the week. But which characters should we pick then?"

Bill pondered. "We _have_ to be in the play or we don't pass."

"And if I don't pass, my dad says he's going to send me to Oates Military School like he always says; this time I think he means it."

"Ted, our mission is clear; find a role that almost no one else wants and then we're in!"

"Great plan Bill; we'll hang back and let everyone else sign-up first, then we find the shortest list."

"Score!" they both yelled.

At the start of the class Mrs. Yasmin allowed fifteen minutes for the students to select their roles to try out for; Bill and Ted waited until the time was almost up and then rushed through the sheets until each found the shortest list and they hurriedly signed their names before returning to their desks.

"Dude, which person did you sign up for?" Bill asked.

"I found one that didn't have any names so I signed it. I didn't read the top."

"Me too! We're gonna be in the play for sure. Excellent!"

Mrs. Yasmin tapped on her desk to get everyone's attention. "Okay class, those of you who wanted to be in the play have had a chance to sign up. Now for the rest of this class let me go over what the play is about and tomorrow we'll have tryouts. Okay, to start out I'll say that this is a play about love and hate. Romeo and Juliet are two..." she continued, taking the rest of the class to give a quick overview of the play with a bit of historical context.

...

"We're going to start tryouts in a moment; let me say that I'm pleased with how many of you actually want to be in the play, but there will be work for everyone. Those of you that are NOT in the play will be helping put it on; we have to rewrite some parts to make it more modern, and there are props and scenery and lights and everything else to take care of to put on a play. I looked at the signup sheets and I think I'm going to add a few non-speaking parts so everyone who signed up gets to be onstage. Would Brad and Jerry come up please for the role of Friar Lawrence?"

Mrs. Yasmin gave the two students the same sheet of paper when they got to the front of the class and had them read the lines of dialogue. "Thank you, boys. Everyone in the class raise your right hand if you think Brad was better, and your left if you think Jerry was better. The one with the fewest votes is going to be one of the party guests." The class voted and Jerry got the role of Friar Lawrence, while Brad joined the party party.

In turn, each role had the prospective actors or actresses come up and read; the people not chosen were given non-speaking roles. This continued for much of the class. Mrs. Yasmin usually let the class decide who had a part; only once did the vote seem to be for someone who obviously was NOT suitable and in that instance she overruled the vote.

"Dude, she hasn't gotten to us yet" Bill whispered to Ted. "Do you think we signed the right sheets?"

Ted thought about it. "If not, maybe we signed up some gym membership or something" he laughed.

Both boys started imitating muscle flexes when Mrs. Yasmin broke up the session by calling out Bill's name. He stood and asked "Yes, Ma'am?"

"Bill, you were the only one to sign up for the part of Rosaline. That's for a girl, Bill."

"I must have thought it some dude's last name, Mrs. Yasmin; sorry. I think I'd die before you see me in a dress. I still want to be in the play, though."

"Very well; Abe canceled his signup because of family vacation, so you can be Benvilio; he plays the part of a good friend."

"I can be a friend, as long as he's not a dic..."

"Bill..." she interrupted.

"...I was going to say not a dictator or other heinous person."

"Good. I'll reassign Maria to Rosaline since she didn't get the part of Lady Capulet. And that brings us lastly to Ted."

Bill sat and Ted stood up straight.

"Ted, you were the only one that signed up for Romeo; I have to say, I really didn't think you'd pick the hardest role in the whole play."

"Huh, neither did I" Ted admitted.

"Since you're the only one who signed up, you get to be him. For both of the leads of the play, I'm assigning you a study partner who's strong in English lit to help with your preparation. Susan, could you help Jacki with Juliet please? And Deidra, I would like you to help Ted with Romeo if you could."

Deidra Carpenter lifted her head from her books and shifted her oval-rimmed glasses towards her teacher. "Do you still want me to work on the modern translation Mrs. Yasmin?"

"I'd love it if you could do both. Will it be too much?"

Deidra considered the possibility of working with Ted Logan and decided that she had to learn Latin and translate the play into that then she would if she got a chance to talk to him. "I think I can do both."

"Great, it's all settled then. Tomorrow we start working on what setting we want the play to be in; that will help us with what vocabulary we can use. Dismissed."


	2. Chapter 2

"How was school today dear?" Nan Carpenter asked her daughter when she came in from school that afternoon.

It was the standard question. Deidra had an assortment of answers that she almost always used: the usual, average, same-o same-o, nothing exciting, I got another A, or they had spinach for lunch. Deidra hated spinach, or at least the kind they served in the cafeteria. But today was different; she had a question for the question.

"Mom, do you know the story of Romeo and Juliet?"

Mrs. Carpenter blinked her green eyes that she shared with her daughter and thought for a moment. "I think I saw that movie...is that the 'To Be or Not to Be' one?"

"No mom, that's Hamlet."

"Oh. Then it must be the one with the young girl and boy that want to get married? I always get those two movies mixed up. Oh yes, I saw that one too."

"We're doing that play in my English lit class."

"Are you going to be in it?"

"No! I don't want to be in front of a bunch of people; Mrs. Yasmin wants me to help write it in more modern language, and she wants me to help the boy doing Romeo to learn his part."

"That's nice. Maybe if he comes over I'll make a big batch of my peanut butter brownies for us."

"Make it a small batch, please mom. I might as well attach them directly to my hips; I love those things."

"Oh Deidra, you're not fat. Thin girls always look like they're sickly; you look...healthy. All you have to do is get another inch or two taller and you'll be perfect."

Deidra rolled her eyes. "Mom, I haven't gotten any taller in two years."

"Oh."

...

During study period the next day, Deidra was sitting down at a table with books around her, rewriting some dialogue for the play when Ted and his friend Bill pulled up chairs on the other side of the table.

"How's it hangin' Deidra?" Ted asked. "Mrs. Yasmin said we should start talking about the play. Whoa, I guess we are!" he laughed.

"Is all that just for the play?" Bill asked, trying to read upside down and giving up. "There are a _lot_ of pages there."

Deidra set down her pen, quietly panicked and then explained nervously "Some are mine, some are the original lines. We have to use modern language but we're also cutting it down so the play isn't so long. Have either of you guys ever seen the play before?"

"No" they answered almost simultaneously.

"The movies?"

"Nope." "Uh uh."

Deidra got over her nervousness by plunging into the topic. "Okay, so what we're doing right is setting the play like it happened today in San Dimas, so no one is going to have to say 'thou' and 'lest' and words like that. Let me give you an example; Ted, how would you say 'What light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and Juliet is the sun'? How would you say it to someone?" She didn't have to find and read the part because she knew it by heart.

Ted scratched his head. "Umm...she can see the sun and moon after I broke Juliet's east window?"

"Dude, I told you not to use such big rocks to get her attention" Bill admonished.

"I guess I don't know my own strength!" Ted laughed.

Even Deidra couldn't help but giggle at the thought. Maybe talking to the guys wasn't going to be as hard as she thought. "That's funny; I might use that in the play!" They all laughed until being shushed by the room monitor. She scribbled down a note to remember before she continued. "Shakespeare was trying to have Romeo tell Juliet that she was beautiful, but he could be funny sometimes too."

"Oh. How about...Juliet, you are a totally righteous babe?"

"Better; that's more modern and it gets the general idea across. But you want to impress her with saying it fancy."

"I get it...Juliet, you are a totally righteous babe who rocks the school with your looks."

"You're getting the idea. Now try this one: 'Parting is such sweet sorrow that I shall say goodnight till it be morrow.' How would you say that Bill, since your character is supposed to be friends with Ted's character? Like you were offering him advice?"

"Hmmm. 'You can catch her later, then maybe you can date her'" Bill offered.

"Well, it rhymes; try to be more romantic like it was a song lyric."

Bill paused and tried again. "Dude, your heart yearns 'till she returns."

"That's it! Now you say it Ted; say it to me like you'd say it to Juliet."

Ted looked into her eyes. "Your heart yearns 'till my returns."

Deidra became lost in the moment temporarily, then snapped out of it. "It needs some work, but the good news is we have until mid-May." The bell rang and she started gathering her papers together. Ted handed her one of the books and she took it, saying "My mom says you can come over to practice sometime if you want. She'll..." Deidra paused and decided to play her trump card "...she'll make some brownies."

"Savory! I'm in, just let me know when. Is Bill invited?"

"Sorry Bill, she didn't give permission for anyone else...maybe another time?"

Bill brightened. "Okay; just bring me one back, dude." The guys high-fived after they all stood up.

"Catch you later, Deidra" Ted said as he turned to leave.

"Catch you later" Deidra grinned. Maybe she was going to be able to act normal around Ted after all.

...

"Okay, this is my house" Deidra said as the two walked along the street on Friday. The much taller Ted almost bounced as he walked, while she glided along just happy to be there.

"Cool, two stories? Did you ever, like, slide down the stairway railing?" he asked.

"No, never. I'd never hear the end of it from my parents if I did." She fumbled and dropped her keys, then picked them up with a little embarrassment. Unlocking the door, she opened it and led Ted inside while announcing "I'm home, and I have a guest!" to warn her mother; with any luck she was down at the store.

Unfortunately, her mother was home and immediately came to the entryway to great the new arrival. She stopped and looked at the boy dressed in long shorts, a rock and roll t-shirt, vest, and a jacket tied around his waist. "Um, hello. I'm Mrs. Carpenter" she said hesitantly.

"Ted, this is my mom" Deidra interceded. "Mom, this is Ted Logan from my play. He's playing Romeo."

"How's it hanging, Mrs. Carpenter?" Ted grinned and stuck out his hand.

Nan looked at the hand to see if anything was hanging off of it, and gingerly shook his hand with only the tips of her fingers. "I'm, uh, hanging good?"

"Excellent. Deidra says you make the best brownies in town! I'm totally looking to scarf some down."

"Thank you. I think. Take a couple and study your play, and I'll give you a few when you leave" Nan offered as she spoke over her shoulder while disappearing into the kitchen. She reappeared with a plate containing several brownies.

"That would be so awesome, I could use the sugar rush" Ted said as he picked up a pair of brownies, dropping a few crumbs on the floor. Deidra bent down to pick up the crumbs and Ted tried to help, dropping even more crumbs.

"Why don't you put them back on the plate and just take the plate with you" Nan suggested.

"Right" Ted agreed, putting back the offending treats.

Deidra took the plate and Ted followed her up the stairs to her room. In anticipation of company, she had spent two hours cleaning up what was already a clean room; her parents always insisted that a tidy room was the sign of a tidy mind. They didn't inspect her room officially, but if comments were ever made it was because it had been espied in an unkempt state.

Upon entering, Ted took stock of his surroundings. "This room is amazingly organized; do you ever, like, lose anything?"

"My sanity sometimes, but that can happen anywhere."

Ted stared for a moment, then smiled. "I hear you. I think some of the best songs were written when the musician was a little crazy. It sure would explain a lot..." he trailed off.

"How long have you been in a band with Bill?"

"We're not officially in a band yet, but we want to start one. We haven't even got a name, but we've got some ideas."

"That's cool. Acting is a little like being a musician; you're still going to be performing in front of people" Deidra suggested.

"I guess; it's like making a music video without the music. I totally get that. Do you think I can do it?"

You can do anything, Deidra thought to herself. What she actually said was "I really think you can, Ted."

"Awesome. I don't think Romeo would want to go to Oates Military School."

"No, but he already knew how to use a sword. As a prince he..."

"DEIDRA!"

The voice originated downstairs but it boomed throughout the house. "Oh no, my dad" Deidra gasped.


	3. Chapter 3

"Downstairs, fast" Deidra said as she jumped up and hurried down the stairs with Ted in pursuit. She hit the bottom of the stairs and came up in front of her father.

Gerry Carpenter stood in his blue uniform that proudly proclaimed him an employee of "Gerry's Plumbing". Not just an employee; he owned and started the company himself and was proud of the fact and quick to admit it. "Deidra, what's the rule about boys?"

Deidra sighed. "No boys in my room. But dad, we were working together on a play for school and..."

"Your mother already told me" he interrupted. "But we make the rules to protect you too." He looked over Ted, giving him the same type of visual inspection her mother did. "You can't be too careful."

"I totally agree, Mr. Carpenter; who knows, I might be an ax-murderer or something!" Ted chimed in.

"You don't say."

"Or I could be selling drugs or gambling or organizing a prostitution ring or..."

"He gets the idea" Deirdra said to stop him. "Dad, this is Ted Logan."

"How do you do, sir?" Ted considered offering a high-five but decided against it.

"I do very well, Ted. Logan...are you related to Captain Jonathan Logan with the police department?"

"That's my dad! Do you know him?"

"I've talked to him and his department people before, and we've gone around a few times on some plumbing I've done over there. Can't say I care for any of them; I think they have an authority complex."

"The complex is pretty big with the jail and all those offices. I've been down there" Ted offered.

"That's not quite what I meant. Hopefully you weren't there as an official resident, but it wouldn't...eh...surprise me. Ted, we're just getting ready for dinner..." Gerry started.

Ted grinned.

"...so I think it's time you leave." Ted's grin disappeared as Gerry continued to talk. "Thank you for coming over; can I get anything for you out of Deidra's room?" he asked.

"I think I left one of Mrs. Carpenter's brownies up there" Ted said wistfully.

"Here Ted, I put a few in a bag for you to take home" Nan offered, thrusting a bag into his hands.

"Thank you Mrs. Carpenter. Um, I'll see you at school Monday Deidra." He gave a small wave and left through the front door.

"He's not like his dad, but I don't think it's any sort of improvement" Gerry mused out loud after Ted left. "Now Deidra, it may sound harsh but we do have that rule for a reason. If you have a boy over, it has to be in the living room or someplace downstairs. No bedrooms."

"Sorry, dad. I did keep the door open."

"I know, it may have been perfectly innocent. But I know how boys are, and that way we can keep an eye on things. Even then, we don't want something like that Mark boy from happening again; you almost didn't come out of your room for two weeks afterward. Now give your dad a hug and go get ready for dinner." Gerry held out his arms and Deidra gave him a hug, before returning to the stairs to go up and wash.

Having the boy downstairs didn't help when it came to her problem with Mark, she thought as she climbed.

Mark.

He was the greatest, or so she thought. Cute, friendly, and he really seemed to care. They weren't officially dating, but he did come over the house a few times and they had gone to the movies and skating. He had asked to see her room, but seemed okay with the rules when her father told him no. They approved of his clean-cut appearance and his dad was an electrician so that made his family okay. Mark was wonderful; even her best friend Debbie said so.

Until she found out that Debbie knew what she was talking about because _she_ started dating him. She still wasn't sure which hurt more, losing a potential boyfriend or losing her best friend but in the end it didn't matter - she wasn't going to let anyone get that close again. Inside her room she looked around and saw Ted's half-eaten brownie sitting on the plate, discarded in their rush to get downstairs. She almost threw it away, but then carefully took it and sealed it in a Ziplock bag trying to fool herself it was just because she didn't want to waste food. She put the baggie in her bedside stand's drawer and then went to wash up.

...

Deidra and Ted sat on a bench under a tree during lunch on Monday. "Ted, I'm sorry about my dad. He means well, but he doesn't want anything to get in the way of me going to college. He didn't get to go after high school, and he thinks it's the best thing for me. Mom backs him up, but I think she really doesn't care too much as long as I'm happy. I had a hard time last year for a while...well...for a while I found it hard to concentrate on my schoolwork. He doesn't want that to happen again, or for me to feel that way either."

"It was that Mark thing, wasn't it?"

Deidra let out a small gasp. "How did you know? I don't think I've ever talked to you about much of anything before. Not that you wouldn't listen I mean, but...oh...I don't know."

"No, I heard it from Bill. He heard it from Kasim who got told by Heather who's friends with Debbie."

"I'm so embarrassed" Deidra said, blushing and looking away.

"Diedra, don't be embarrassed. It was like totally bogus what happened, and it wasn't your fault. You're a most excellent person, and if they did that then...then...well, you don't need 'em that's what."

"Thanks Ted."

"Hey, it's what friends are for."

At that moment a funny feeling came over Deidra, and it almost made her dizzy. A small part of her was disappointed at hearing the word 'friend' because it was looking for something different. But a larger part was thrilled with being considered a friend instead of "some girl I go to school with". The two factions battled quickly for supremacy, with the thrilled part barely winning out. "Yeah?" she asked meekly.

"Yeah. Cool. Guys can be good friends too; we just have, like, deeper voices and we're usually taller. Bill's a great friend."

"I know; I see you guys together all the time. Do you ever fight?"

"What, each other? Nah. We kid around and yank each other's chain sometimes, but we're cool about it. Bill and me are like the three musketeers."

"BOTH of you?" she asked with a smile.

"Yeah, I mean...oh...yeah, right...there's only two of us! That probably sounded pretty stupid."

"Not at all. It sounds wonderful...except for the math part."

"Yeah; math isn't my strong suit. I need help in just about everything" he laughed.

"Speaking of, let's go over some lines before lunch is over. Now the second scene..."

...

"Deacon, you were supposed to tell Dad that I was bringing someone over after school!" Ted said with exasperation to his younger brother. Hearing keys in the front door, it was a little late to give his dad a heads up on a visitor. It was better to meet the problem head on, thought Ted as he jumped up from his seat on the coach to race to the front door. You couldn't count on little brothers to remember anything that didn't have to do with an allowance.

"Ted?" his father questioned as he opened the door to find his older son standing behind it.

"Oh, hi Dad! I wanted to let you know I've got a friend over working on school work with me right now. And you don't have to worry, Deacon is working as a chaparral."

"I think you mean chaperone. If it's a girl, I approve son" he said as he clapped his son on the side of the arm - tantamount to a full endorsement from the elder Logan. He continued into the living room to find Deidra standing beside a coffee table strewn with books and papers. "Hello there, I'm Mr. Logan" he said as he entered.

Hurrying to catch up, Ted introduced his guest. "Dad, this is Deidra from school. We're working on that play for our English class, the one we're both in."

"How do you do, Mr. Logan" Deidra said as she shook hands.

"I'm glad to see my son taking an interest in school. It seems like every year I have to threaten him with military school so he doesn't fail his classes. I think he'd be more like his brother if he just buckled down and studied. What are you working on?" he asked as he looked over the papers on the table. "Romeo and Juliet. Good story. Translated by Deidra Carpenter. I'm sure you have a...wait. Carpenter? Are you any relation to Gerry Carpenter?"

"Yes sir, that's my father."

"I see. Interesting." The elder Logan seemed to think for a minute. "Ted, we're going out for dinner tonight. Deacon, you and Ted get ready to go. Deidra, I'm sorry it's short notice but I haven't fixed anything and so we're going to grab a bite. Can I drop you at home on the way?"

"Do you know where I live?"

"No, but I'm a police officer and it isn't good to be walking around alone in the evening. I'd feel better if I dropped you off. Gather up your stuff please and we'll be off in" he checked his watch "five minutes. Hup!" Deacon hustled to his room, while Ted paused and shrugged to Deidra to show his confusion at the change of plans before leaving as well. Deidra collected her things while Ted's father waited silently.

While waiting to get into the car Ted whispered "We were supposed to have leftovers tonight like we do every Wednesday" to Deidra before they got in, her in the front and the brothers in the back. No conversation was had except for Deidra giving her address.

After she was dropped off, Mr. Logan suddenly announced he had forgotten his wallet and when they got back to the house decided it was better just to eat at home.

Ted was going to question the change of plans but felt it was better to hold his tongue.


	4. Chapter 4

The next day Deidra found Bill and Ted sitting on the grass in the shade under a tree. "Hi Deidra!" Ted greeted as she walked up. "I was just telling Bill about our parents."

"The situation is most egregious" Bill tried to empathize.

"It's totally uncool" Ted agreed. "Even if my dad doesn't like your dad, I don't see why we can't hang out together. It's like, official school stuff and all."

"I know. There's a lot of work to do still and I don't know if we have enough time during school to get you ready" Deidra worried.

"Bag it" Bill stated flatly. They both turned to look at him. "Look, this Saturday tell your dads you're going down to the library to study; have 'em drop you off there. Then meet somewhere nearby and study your play thing. Get back to the library, get picked up and everything is okay. You studied the play, right?"

"Right dude!" Ted agreed. "That's what we're really doing."

"I'll help cover for you. We need to pass this class or else..."

"I know" Ted cut him off. "Oates..."

"...Military..." Bill added.

"...School" Deidra finished.

"Okay. Saturday - library - 10am. Bring a lunch to buy us more time, get picked up at 3. There's a skate park nearby where we can study" Ted said, setting the plan into action. He put his hand out and Ted put his on top. Deidra added hers on top "One for all..."

"...and all for one" the two guys joined together.

...

Sam Preston opened his front door to see two men standing on his doorstep. He looked at both and recognized one of them. "Aren't you Ted's father?"

"Jonathan Logan, yeah. And this is Deidra's father Gerry Carpenter."

"Come on in. Who's Deidra?"

Gerry barged in first and looked around. "Are they here? Deidra!"

"What is this?" Missy Adams asked, entering the room.

"This is my fiance" Sam said as he introduced the men. "They're looking for Ted and a girl named Deidra. The only kid here is Bill."

"If anybody knows, Bill does" Jonathan surmised.

"Bill!" Sam called.

A door opened down the hall and Bill emerged with music playing from inside. He walked into the room and noted all the new arrivals. "Hello Mr. Logan."

"Bill, this is Deidra's father. Do you know where they are?" Sam asked.

"Ted was going to go down to the library to study his play" Ted said.

"But they weren't down there when we went to check on them" Gerry countered. "Your friend Ted probably lured her away somewhere."

"That's a bunch of crap, Gerry" Jonathan countered. "Unless you're saying your daughter is so dumb..."

"...don't call MY daughter dumb..."

"GUYS!" Missy screeched. They halted their argument and she turned to Bill. "Bill, we know they went to the library. Do you know where they went _after_ that?"

Bill started to sweat. He hadn't planned on being questioned that specifically, and didn't have a true cover for that part. Missy made her sweet face and he fumbled. "They said something about maybe Runaway..."

"They ran away?" Gerry yelled, with Jonathan nearly echoing him. The scrum moved outside as the arguing continued, completely drowning out Bill's attempt to explain that Runaway was the informal name of the skate park near the library. Fed up, he went into the garage and got his bicycle and rode out onto the street and towards Runaway. Missy noticed him leave and approached the men.

...

"...and that's when I got out of there" Bill finished. "No one was listening, so I came here. The cheese is most definitely binding."

"It's hit the fan..." Ted agreed.

"...and there's something rotten far from Denmark" Deidra concluded. "What do we do?"

Ted stood at attention. "It is time to make a stand. We draw the line here."

Bill joined him. "Joined together, against the bogus oppression of unrealistic grudges we aren't a part of."

Swelling with optimism, Deidra joined them. "To take arms against a sea of troubles and by opposing end them. Because you have to fight for your right to party!" Bill and Ted both stared at Deidra. "Sorry, I got carried away there."

"Whatever," Ted said "it rocked!"

Their enthusiasm was quickly tested when a familiar car drove up and screeched to a halt. Jonathan marched over toward the group, followed closely by Gerry and Sam, with Missy bringing up a distant rear.

"Be strong" Ted said in a lowered voice.

"Bend, but do NOT break" Bill added.

"Fight fire with fire" Deidra said through gritted teeth, clenched so they wouldn't chatter from fear. It actually came out "Fight far wiff far."

Reaching the kids first, Jonathan started to chastise Ted when the younger Logan held out his hand in a stop motion. Perplexed, the adults were silent.

Ted cleared his throat. "I have something to say, and I want to be heard. Dad, you're my dad and I love you and I know you totally want to do what's best for me. I know you hate Mr. Carpenter for some plumbing thing..."

"I don't _hate_ him, son..."

"...and I know he hates you..."

"...that's not true at all" Mr. Carpenter admitted.

"...and if you two want to throw down that's your business because it's between you two. Is it not true that you completely changed how you treated a guest when you found out who her father was?"

"No."

"Oh really? I thought it was."

"It was."

"What?"

Bill took over from Ted. "Dude, don't ask a negative question" he said in an aside to his friend before continuing. "The point my good friend was trying to make is that you shouldn't judge us based on how you feel about our parents. We're totally different people and we're getting along with everyone; don't slag us for making friends as long as we're excellent to each other. Sirs."

Emboldened, Deidra spoke up before she chickened out. "Mr. Logan, Mrs. Yasmin _asked_ me to help Ted. But you know what? I'd help him anyway, because he's a great guy and he needs to nail this play to pass the class. I thought you wanted him to do well in school?"

"Of course I do, but..."

"Then all we're asking is let's help him the best way that works for him, okay? We're not sneaking off to make out behind a building; we're doing _school_ work." She turned to her father. "Dad, I know you are looking out for me because you don't want the same thing to happen like it did with Mark." She surprised herself by being able to say the name without hurting. "Would you rather I wait and maybe have the same thing happen when I'm away at college, or maybe try to have a good relationship with friends here in San Dimas with your support behind me?"

"Well..." Mr. Carpenter hemmed "...if you put it that way..."

A small gust blew across the park, and started scattering the papers the three had spread across the table behind them. "Our notes!" yelled Deidra, and the three frantically began chasing down papers. The four adults joined in the chase, and all were soon dashing between bushes and climbing fences to reach wayward pages. After about fifteen minutes everyone reported back with everything that could be found, handing in their treasures to Deidra who collated the returns until at last she gave an update. "I think we got everything, including someone's shopping list and a flyer for a car wash." The mood of the group had shifted from confrontational to congratulatory.

"This really is important to me dad" Ted told his father.

"Then I guess it's important to me, too" Mr. Logan sheepishly admitted.

"I agree too" Mr. Carpenter chimed in.

The seven stood around somewhat awkwardly for a moment, then Missy broke the silence with a "Who wants ice cream?"

...

"The audience really seemed to like the play" Deidra told Ted as they stood in the school parking lot outside the auditorium. "They laughed and cheered and applauded at the end."

"I guess; I was so nervous from trying to remember my lines I didn't pay attention."

"It was great. I was watching from the side; did you know our parents were sitting together?"

"Wow, maybe they'll go bowling together or something" Ted suggested.

"My dad hates bowling."

"So does mine! That's something else we have in common. Awesome!" Ted grinned. "I passed the class and my dad is cool with yours, kinda like the play. Funny how it worked out that way...school is ending great this year."

"Please Ted, don't remind me" Deidra said as her smile faded.

"What? Why?"

"Because you said 'ended'. This _has_ been my greatest time ever, but in two weeks school will be over and we won't see each other again until the fall. I'm not happy about that."

"Why do you say that - are you going to be gone for the summer?"

"No."

"Neither am I! We can still hang together during the summer; it's not like I have a job or anything and we don't live that far apart" Ted said encouragingly.

"Just me and you and Bill? That wouldn't be so bad I guess."

"Bill's dad is getting married to Missy and he has to stay with his aunt in Phoenix during their honeymoon. It'll just be you and me for awhile if that's okay."

"I think I could live with that" Deidra grinned. "Do you mind if I give you a hug?"

Ted spread his arms. "I can totally live with that."

The End

* * *

**A/N: This was written as a request for LiveFoREVer93 and the character of Deidra and the idea to use Romeo and Juliet belongs to that user; the characters of "Bill & Ted" and Romeo and Juliet belong to their respective creators.**


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